emily turns one

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i really wasn’t looking forward to the weekend on friday. thus the custard puff for breakfast. i thought, i’ll start friday by eating something yummy, and maybe the yumminess would just follow through to the weekend. well. ok. it was a thought.

friday night was boring. it has been for years, why stop now.

saturday, missey andrea and i took daisy, olive and baby tabitha to the dog park. daisy, was well behaved (for a change). she didn’t try to mount anyone. that was good. olive on the other hand was scared to death. olive is about 8 lbs. she is an italian greyhound. she is skin and bones. she normally loves to play, but i think the 10 other dogs in the small dog area were just too much to take. i ended up carrying olive to the car. she really couldn’t handle the pressure. all in all, the dog park was a nice time.

i got back to the house about 11:30. i needed to be to anne’s just after 1 for emily’s b-day party. i took a little nap, stopped by the post office to mail a birthday card for the rocker (from daisy), and then drove down to annes. i got there about 1:20. i helped move food around, and talked to anne’s mother for a minute and then… my sister’s bestest friend in the whole world walked in the kitchen.

anne and i were trying to get all the cold food items put away… we walked back to the other fridge, and she says… “your sister is coming too. she will be here later. you aren’t mad at me are you?”

what? mad? me mad? why the hell should i be mad? lets see…

  • i just dumped my chance at having a child two and 1/2 weeks ago
  • there are 5 little babies with their happy parents attending said party
  • lets not forget about the happy pregnant people
  • AND my sisters ENTIRE support system is here

you think NOW is the time for me to chat with my sister? let me think. NO. THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO BRING TOGETHER MY DISFUNCTIONAL FAMILY.

by this time, mar’s bestest friend had called her to make sure she wasn’t as caught off guard as i was (did i tell you how much i adore this woman?).

so i tried. i really did. i talked to anne’s dad for a little bit. then i held emily for a minute. then i did the smartest thing i had done all day. i checked my cell to make sure i didn’t have messages.

you know it. i did.

no, not the rocker. i would have groveled on hands and knees to have him back at that point. no, not my mom. at 2:15, miss nikki called to cancel our weekend plans of sabercats football and pedicures.

that was it. i thought i could handle being at that party if i knew i had something to look forward to after. i figured i’d be leaving before my sister got there anyway. but no. i had no one. not a soul. not even anne. i told her i had to go. she walked me to the door, and i left sobbing.

i sobbed the 20 minutes home, i actually sobbed until 6:00pm when i decided not to waste my tickets and i went to the game. it was the first time i had ever gone to a game alone. lucky for me, it wasn’t as hard as i thought.

after the game, i chatted with nikki. nate was running a fever, and she was just as irritated that she couldn’t go as i was. it seems we were both having days.

sunday, i slept alot. crying takes a ton out of you. i called the rocker. he didn’t answer. i didn’t think he would. i told him i missed him. it’s true. i do. i cried some more, then i went to the mall. i had a frosty for dinner and went to bed.

that is the last anne party that i will attend. i’m not sure i will even have lunch with her again for awhile. i love anne dearly, but she hurt me saturday. it will be a minute before i trust her again.

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Comments

  1. there’s nothing like a good sporting event to scream and let out a little tension…
    everything a bit better now???